I’ve posted this story before, but left out the worst part (in my mind) of it.  About three (maybe four) years ago, my then five-year-old son stopped smiling normally.  He would smile with half his mouth – like a cartoon.  I was mildly annoyed at first, but didn’t really say much.  I might’ve asked him to smile normally, but then let it go.  I figured he would get tired of it and go back to his normal smile that lit up his whole face.

The next day he was still smiling like that and I was getting more annoyed.  I remember that we were swimming and he wanted to do something (stay in longer, jump off the ladder, I really don’t remember).  He smiled that half smile when he asked.  I told him he could if he would smile normally.  He smiled again…the same half smile.  I was beyond annoyed and told him no, it was time to get out.  He was upset, but he got out.  I’m pretty sure I reminded him several times that it was his fault – if he had just smiled normally.  I don’t remember if he told me he couldn’t smile or not.  I just remember being upset with him (it seems so trivial looking back).

That evening, John noticed that his face wasn’t right.  He asked our son to smile – half smile.  Then he asked him to wink.  He winked one eye, but couldn’t wink the other.  Now, that was strange!  I can only wink one eye, but my son loves to show me how he can wink both eyes.  My husband (who instead of getting mad, looked for other reasons – I’m so thankful for that!) asked him to shut his eyes tight.  He couldn’t.  One eye would squeeze tight shut, but the other one would just barely close.  Now, instead of being annoyed, I felt terrible.  There really was something wrong and I never knew it!  Instead of asking questions, I was sure I knew what was wrong (don’t moms know it all??).

While I apologized to our son, my husband quickly searched the internet for a reason and came up with Bell’s Palsy.  It sounded scary.  The next day I called our pediatrician and they got him in that day.  She agreed with our diagnosis and said that it should clear up by itself.  Frequently they don’t find a cause, but just to be safe she wanted to test him for Lyme disease.  Oh my poor child!  First I hadn’t believed him and now he was going to need bloodwork.  I tried to shield him from that – we had to go to the hospital, but I was really hoping he wouldn’t realize why we were there.  Nope!  All of my kids had been with me to the hospital on various occasions and they knew that Mommy always got bloodwork there.  My five-year-old very quickly figured out that was why he was there too.  I’m pretty sure the whole hospital heard him!  He was inconsolable, but fortunately there were no lines so everything went quickly.  The nurses were so nice to him and somehow managed to get blood from a kicking and screaming little boy.  A couple days later we had the diagnosis – Lyme disease from a tick bite.  The cure was simple – a 21 day course of antibiotics.  Since we had caught it early there would be no lasting effects.  The Bell’s Palsy cleared up within days of starting the antibiotics.

My guilt took a lot longer to clear up and I’m still not sure it has.  He remembers when Mommy didn’t believe him.  Every now and then, from out of the blue, he’ll ask if I remember.  Oh yes, I do!

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This post is linked at Bad Mom Monday

We’ve never lived close to family until our recent move.  We got married and moved across the state (250 miles) the following week.  When our daughter was born eight years later, she quickly became a great traveler!  We went to see our parents just about every other weekend.  As an infant, she was great – one stop to nurse and she would go back to sleep.  She was also spoiled – if I was driving, John would sit in back with her and vice versa.  She was never alone in the back seat.  At some point before she turned one though, she stopped being such a good traveler.  She was normally fine Friday night on our way out – probably because it was bedtime.  However, she was increasingly fussy on the drive home Sunday afternoon.  We quickly learned that playing through all the goofy sounds on our phones would entertain her.  This was before you could have fancy ringtones – these were just the digital-sounding tones that came on our phones.  Whatever, it worked!  We would point out Christmas lights and she would calm down too.  Of course, if more lights didn’t come along quickly, she got fussy again.  Then we would point out car lights too – anything to keep her calm.

When baby brother came along two years later, he wasn’t such a good traveler.  Our trips to visit our parents slowed some.  It was too stressful to be in the car with an unhappy infant for that long!  Plus, our dear daughter started getting car sick.  There’s nothing like the sound of a kid puking when you’re in the middle of nowhere and have nothing but pillowcases to clean her up with.  Add to that an unhappy baby who thinks that we’ve arrived because the car is stopped and everyone is getting out (everyone but him).  Baby brother number two came along just over two years later and he was an even worse traveler.

When we would go on vacation (mostly to Ocean City, NJ), we would make the six hour drive in the evening.  The kids would fall asleep (eventually) and it was easier to travel.  We also had a dvd player in our van – what a wonderful invention!  We would stop once for potty break and to get a snack (and coffee for me).  Our other destination was Florida to visit my parents.  When the kids were little, we flew.  For a while two of them were free and it was so much easier!  However, when we looked at buying five plane tickets, we choked on the price and talked about driving.  It would definitely be cheaper, but could we handle being in the car that long?  For the cost savings, the answer was yes!  We planned lots of things to keep the kids from getting too bored.

• They each got to bring a coloring book or note book and something to write or color with.
• We brought Mobigo and fresh batteries – any handheld video or smartphone loaded with games would work.
• Books to read – we also warned them that if they started feeling sick, they needed to stop reading immediately!
• Pillows and blankets – each kid had a pillow or two plus something to cover up with.
• Snacks – nothing makes kids (or adults) cranky like being hungry.  We stuck to semi-healthy stuff – bananas, baby carrots, peanut butter sandwiches for lunch, bottled water, crackers, pretzels, trail mix.
• They each got to pick movies plus we picked a couple that we thought they would enjoy
• Plan for stops – we stopped at most state welcome centers and walked around.  The kids (and adults) could run around the picnic areas.
• No hero drives – we talked about it, but there was no way we would be able to stay awake all night!  Plus, I just like to be out of the car for a few hours at the end of the day and sleep in a bed.
• Look for hotels that have a free continental breakfast.  That way there’s no searching for a breakfast place.  The first time we drove, we left the hotel at 5am!  We thought Burger King would be open by 6am so we stopped about an hour down the road, but it didn’t open until 6:30am.  We ended up waiting until it opened (that’s another story).
• Get an early start (but not too early)- we grab a quick breakfast at the hotel and get on the road.
• Remember to relax and enjoy the ride!  Nothing makes kids cranky like cranky parents!  If you’re relaxed, they’re more likely to relax too.

What’s your best tip for traveling with kids?